Imbroglio: Part Two

by Jessica Zyvarek Taylor

When the plane landed, they gathered their bags in silence.  She knew he was going to be slightly upset to find out that she'd requested time off and she figured she might as well try to smooth things over before he had the chance to blow up again.  Try to make herself look a little less like a snake.

While they were walking towards the parking lot, she stopped him.  "Look, Mulder, I know we're having a difference of opinion right now and I don't see either one of us bending any time soon, so why don't we just stop talking about it?"

He nodded and began walking again.  "Yeah, whatever."

Her car was in a different direction and she was too tired to chase after him.  "Fine, Mulder, I'm going this way."  Then she started walking herself, not looking back to realize that he hadn't looked back either.

It was just after eight when finally pulled out of parking lot.  She was tired, but her nap on the plane has revived her somewhat.  She drove to the hospital and stared at the building.  What the hell was he doing?  Why did she feel helplessly drawn to this man, this man who had brought her and her best friend and both of their families immeasurable pain?  She didn't know.  She glanced in the rear view mirror before she got out of the car.  She recognized the car parked two rows behind her.  She turned back and fixed her gaze at the windshield.  With the sunlight reflecting off the hood the way it was, she couldn't tell if he was in the car, or even if it was his car.  But in case he was there, she wanted him to know that she knew he'd followed her.  Then she turned away and walked into the hospital.

She knew it was still a few hours before visiting hours officially began and Angela was already off, but she hoped she could get in to see Krycek.  After the night she'd had, she wanted to see someone who wasn't going to go out of his way to make her crazy.  At least Krycek was subtle about his manipulations.  If he was even manipulating her.

No one paid any attention to her as she walked to his room.  No one paid any attention as she walked through the door.  Except for him.  The biggest smile she'd ever seen was plastered across his face as soon as he saw it was her.  She couldn't help but smile back, seeing how happy he was to see her.  She pulled the chair over to the side of his bed and sat down, not even realizing how weird it was for her to be there since she felt so comfortable.

"I thought you were away."  The smile remained on his face while he spoke.

"I was.  We just got in a little while ago."  She was staring at him and therefore didn't miss the way he winced at her words.

"We?"  The smile was gone.

"I was working."  It would only make sense that it would be as horrible discussing Mulder with Krycek as it was discussing Krycek with Mulder.  Just thinking of the position she was in struck her as funny and she started to smile again.

"What's so funny?"

She stopped herself before she started to laugh.  "Nothing."  He wasn't convinced.  "OK, everything.  This, especially."

"Why?"  He sounded so confounded that for a moment she thought he might honestly not understand.  But then he started to smile, obviously realizing the joke.  "Never mind.  So, where were you?"  Anything to change the subject.

"Wyoming.  Have the doctors told you anything useful?" She picked up the booklet lying beside the phone and paged through it.  It was the Guide to Patient Services, and according to the menu it listed, Krycek was eating better than she did at home.

"That one, Dr. Kelley, I think.  She asked me if I was married and when I said no"  Why did she feel better when he said that?  "she told me that I couldn't go home then.  Maybe I should have said yes."

Scully smiled and put the book back down.  "She probably wanted to rope your wife into looking after the stitches since you can't be trusted not to tear them out."  He blushed and looked away.

"I thought I could reach.. Wait, how did you know about that?"

"I called last night to see how you were doing.  Angela was very informative."  He looked back up and looked her in the eye.

"Yeah, she was telling me how obviously in love with me my wife was."  His raised eyebrow made her blush.

She picked up the booklet again and became quite interested in the list of patient advocate numbers.  After a few minutes he tapped on the paper, calling her attention back to him.

"Dr. Kelley said that since I live by myself then I have to stay here until the stitches come out.  So, looks like I'll be here for a few more days."

She opened her mouth and spoke, not realizing what she was saying until it was too late.  "Nonsense.  You can stay with me."

They stared at each other, not sure who's mouth was open wider.  And then, he answered her, not sure where he was getting the courage. "OK, thank you."  He smiled at her.  And she smiled back.

It was fortunate that she'd already taken a few days off.  It took almost two hours before all the paperwork was signed and taken care of.  Of course, all the insurance information that Scully hadn't been able to give the nurses had to be given before they'd let him leave.  But finally, the doctor who was covering for Dr. Kelley gave Krycek his copy of everything and said they could leave.  Miraculously, Dr. Kelley herself wasn't working and wouldn't be witness to the FBI agent taking the ex-prisoner home.  One less explanation for Scully to make.

But even after they'd been given permission to leave, one problem remained.  He didn't have a shirt.  His jeans were still there, bloody, but good enough to get him home.  The shirt, however, was long gone.  And he didn't have a coat.  None of these things had been priorities when he was bleeding to death in her hallway, yet all provided logistical difficulties now that he wanted to leave.

"I've got a sweatshirt in the car that will fit you, let me go get it."  She tossed him his jeans before she started for the door.  "Why don't you put these on, save us from having to go through that again."

He smiled at her, and had a feeling that she was smiling even as she walked away. "Awww, come on Scully, I thought that was kind of fun."

She slammed the door behind her and headed to the car.  When she got there, she got in the front seat, rested her head on the wheel, and screamed.  She surveyed the parking lot to be sure no one had heard her and then started looking through her bag to find her brother's old sweatshirt.  She found it, and was about to head back to the hospital, but she stopped and looked at her reflection in the mirror.

"What the hell am I doing?"  She didn't care who saw her talking to herself.  She kind of hoped someone would so they could stop her from putting her own insane plan into action.  She was inviting Krycek to stay at her house.  And he was agreeing.  She wondered if maybe they both wouldn't be better off in a hospital somewhere.  She readjusted the mirror and then drove to the front door, parked in the fire lane and went back to Krycek's room.

He was staring out the window, dressed only in his jeans, and didn't notice her return.  She smiled, admiring the view, and tossed the shirt at him.  He turned around and started to put on the shirt, but he noticed her stare and moved deliberately slowly.  Or at least, it seemed that way to her.  It may just have been the not quite healed hole in his side that prompted him to move slowly.  He tugged it down over his head, noticing for the first time that it was two sizes too big for him.  "Isn't this a little big for you?"

She nodded.  "It was my brother's.  Until I stole it."  He grinned at her.

"Your one of those, then."  He picked up his papers and stepped closer to

"One of what?"  She saw him favor his left side as he walked and quickly moved to help him walk.

"One of those girls that steal clothes from every guy she knows."  He slipped his arm around her shoulder, grateful for the assistance.

She was about to deny it when she looked down and realized she was wearing a blazer she'd stolen from Mulder as a jacket.  So you know about us then.  Guys aren't supposed to know, they're just supposed to not notice when their clothes disappear."  She walked slowly, with her arm around his waist.  For someone who needed her help to walk, he was barely putting any weight on her.  She wasn't sure he was really having all that much trouble walking. But she didn't mind, so she didn't say anything.

"Your association of thieves had a leak. She told me all about it on her way out the door wearing my coat."

Come to think of it, Scully would definitely love to get her hands on that black leather jacket of his.  She wondered where he kept it.  "Who's the leak?  We'll have to expel her."

The good natured teasing stopped when he answered.  His voice had turned serious and he took a long time to answer.  "She's dead."

She didn't know what she'd stumbled into, but it didn't sound like a good idea to continue.  "I'm sorry."

He was quiet during the elevator ride to the first floor.  "I'm sorry too.  She was my wife."  Scully didn't have a chance to hide the fact that she tripped over her own feet at his words.  Again, they were silent while she helped him into the car and started the trip back to her apartment.

"Why were you so surprised to hear that I was married once?"  He sounded like he'd given a lot of thought to the question and was interested in discovering the answer.

Any of the list of answers that popped into her head.  She struggled to pick one that would sound appropriate but she couldn't find one so she didn't answer.

"You didn't think a guy like me would be married?"  Taking advantage of being stopped at a red light, she turned to face him and did her best impression of a leer that Mulder would have been proud of.

"And why exactly would a guy like *you* not be married?"  His open mouthed stare was all the answer she needed.  She smirked and hit the gas pedal.

It took him a second to recover.  "I was talking about my…um, job."

Her smile faded.  "Well, there's that…"  She suddenly became very interested in the car in front of them.

"But that's not it?"

She didn't understand why he was pushing the issue.  But he was, so she chose the next answer on her list to keep him quiet.  "I don't know.  Marriage is so…"  She glanced at him and found his eyes trained on her. "You just always seemed like such a kid…"

Her words trailed off at the sound of his laughter.  It wasn't just a little chuckle, he was laughing.  So much that he grasped his side and told her that it hurt to laugh and that she shouldn't try.  She just kept driving, turning to look at him every few minutes.

"Care to let me in on the joke?  What's so funny?"  She felt so comfortable with him, but with him so amused at something she didn't find funny, she started to get nervous.

"Kid?  Scully, I'm older than you."  He was grinning at her.  She didn't have to look at him to know.

"What?  I don't believe you.  No way."  He couldn't be older than her.  He didn't look a day over 25.

He grinned harder and nodded.  "Born in '62."

She shook her head again, refusing to listen.  "No way, I don't believe you."  She slowed down as she tried to fit her car into a tight parking space.

"Kind of takes the thrill out of cradle robbing when you find out you're not, huh?"  Why was he talking like they were involved?  She decided he was just trying to unnerve her so she retaliated the only way she could think of.  She couldn't let him have the last word.

"Nah, just makes me feel better about introducing you to my mom."  Then she winked at him.  She actually winked at him.  And tried to stop herself from giggling at his expression.  It was a perfect mix of amusement, admiration, and hope.  It made a pack of butterflies which were studying hula dancing take up residence in her stomach.  The intense look in his eyes made her heart sign up for a course as well.  She swallowed and got out of the car, her only chance of surviving this was that he might be as confused and on edge as she was.  It was a long shot.  But still, it was the only one she had.

She was halfway around the car when she turned around and got back in.  He looked at her, confused by her behavior.

"Unless you want to stand up all the time, you're going to have to get clean jeans.  And I want the sweatshirt back."  No one wearing anything with dried blood on it was sitting on her sofa.  No matter how cute he was.

"So we're going shopping?"  He looked down at the clothes he was wearing.  The outfit was acceptable for leaving the hospital, but that was about it.  He wasn't relishing the idea of going out anyway.  He was still in pain and the effort of walking to the car was making him excessively tired.  He just wanted to lay down.

"Are you telling me that's the only thing you own?  Laundry day must be interesting."  She realized he probably just didn't want to tell her where he lived, in case she changed her mind at some point and decided to hate him too.

"My apartment's in Georgetown.  I'm not sure I'm dressed for the mall."

"You're not dressed for Georgetown either."  He purposely ignored the way she rolled her eyes.  He was obviously paid well for his services.  She sighed and aimed the car toward his apartment.  Once they got there, he directed her into a small parking lot, complete with a lot attendant who seemed pleased to see Krycek.  He leaned into the car to make sure they were supposed to be there.  Parking was not easy to come by in that area.

"Alex!  I wasn't sure if you were coming back.  I thought maybe something had happened."

Krycek extended his hand past Scully and shook the man's hand, in a display that seemed to Scully to be a little too civilized for a man like Krycek.  She shook her head, trying to rid herself of the stereotyped bad guy she had Krycek pegged as.  The man was full of surprises.  And Scully had a feeling a lot more were coming her way as long as she was keeping company with him.

The other man nodded his head toward Scully.  "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend?"

She smiled politely while Krycek spoke, although she was suddenly in a hurry to get home and see if Mulder had called about her 'vacation.'  "Brian, this is Dana."  He stopped, momentarily unsure of how to address her.

She came to his rescue, offering Brian her hand. "It's nice to meet you, Brian, but we're in a bit of a hurry."  Brian nodded and stepped back, allowing Scully to finally pull through the gate and park.  Krycek directed her to the back of the lot and into a numbered space.  She saw him looking over the BMW next to them and knew it was his.  She felt a twinge of jealousy rising up until she reminded herself that he had paid for it all with his soul and that the only person who cared about him, other than his dead wife, was her.  An expensive apartment and car would never take the place of Mulder in her life.  The thought surprised her, but she pushed it down with the rest of the 'I'll think about it later' thoughts and helped Krycek out of the car.

He'd been silent since they'd left Brian and remained so while they limped up to the second floor of the building.  He pulled out a key and unlocked the door, holding it open for her.  She was getting more and more uncomfortable, but opted to say nothing, figuring that if she decided she simply couldn't take it any longer he was home and she could leave him there.  She stepped into the spacious, sparsely furnished apartment.  The few decorations she could see were tasteful and elegant, and she couldn't shake the feeling that the decorating scheme wasn't Krycek's idea.

He let her look around.  "Becky decorated.  I never got around to changing anything."  His words trailed off and she actually caught the pained expression on his face.  When he caught her looking he started walking down the hall.  "I'll be right back."  She nodded, and continued to peer around, assuming that Becky was his wife.  A group of pictures on a small table caught her attention.  She checked to make sure Krycek wasn't on his way back and then walked over to look at them.

She didn't feel comfortable sitting on the couch for whatever reason, so she picked the frames up one at a time and looked at them.  The first one she chose she decided must have been their wedding picture.  He was standing behind her with his arms around her waist.  He wasn't wearing a tux, just a plain dark suit, and the pretty blonde wore a peach colored sundress.  She was holding a bouquet of wild flowers and resting her arms on top of his.  Both of them looked positively ecstatic.  Scully found herself smiling at the photo, it wasn't an expensive pretentious wedding, yet they were so obviously happy together.  She gently placed it back on the table and picked up another.  It was of Krycek and Becky again, this time at the beach.  He was carrying her piggyback, her arms wrapped so tightly around his neck that it looked like he couldn't breathe.  He looked so different in the pictures.  It was the same man she knew, but these were from a different time.  A much happier time.  She knew the pictures had to be several years old, and she wondered what she'd been doing the day he was having so much fun at the beach with his wife.

She could hear him moving around in the other room so she carefully looked over the pictures before choosing another one, wanting to have enough time to examine them all, knowing she didn't.  The next one, though, almost knocked her down.  It was very dark, and she immediately thought that the flash should have been on.  But looking at the image, she knew why it hadn't been.  Krycek was stretched out asleep in a chair, a tiny sleeping infant contentedly resting on his chest.  She could see how tightly his arm was wrapped around the little girl, even in his sleep.  The baby couldn't have been more than a few weeks old.  Becky, presumably had gone to check on her newborn and found Krycek already there.  The flash would have woken them both.  And Scully knew, as Becky had, that it was wrong to interrupt such a special moment.  Tears were welled up in her eyes, and she hadn't even known the family.  This was the side of Krycek she had never seen, the side that she hadn't been sure had even existed until she'd seen the picture.  It had to be the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen.

She was still staring at the picture, a few errant tears making their way down her cheeks, when he hobbled back into the room.  He could see what she was looking at, knew exactly what picture was in that frame, but he didn't see her tears.  He crept up behind her as quietly as he could, so that he might get a glimpse of the picture over her shoulder.  She hadn't noticed his presence yet because of the spell the picture had cast over her.

"Her name was Ali."

She jumped at the sound of his words, so startled that she almost dropped the picture.  He took it out of her hands and placed it face down on the table.  She didn't know what to say.  She could tell from his words that the girl was no more, probably dead along with his wife.  She wondered what had happened to them.  She wondered if it was losing them that turned him into the man he was, or if he had always been the same, hiding his job from his wife and baby daughter.  She wanted to offer her condolences, but she wasn't sure how.  And being the tough guy that he was, he probably wouldn't want them anyway.

He picked up his bag and lightly took her arm.  "Let's go."  She nodded, and then turned to the door.  In doing so, the light reflected off the tears on her face and he saw them.  She heard him gasp, and since he'd already seen and there was no point trying to hide it, she reached up and openly wiped at the tears.  She wanted to know so badly what had turned him from that loving husband and father into the man she knew.  But it wasn't her place to ask.  Besides, she probably already knew the answer.  It was all the same things that had turned her from the idealistic, young girl she had been into the stoic FBI agent she was.  All the same misery and bad luck and some of the same experiences, just in different quantities at different intervals.  She could just as easily have been in his place and he in hers.  But she realized one more difference between them when he ran his hand along her face, silently apologizing for making her cry.

He was trying to become that wonderful person again.  She wasn't.  She was too busy trying to pretend that she had never been that person.  And now she wasn't sure why.  Life had changed her, as it did with everyone.  She was trying to deny it, trying to convince herself that she had always been the same distrustful person.  He was admitting it, admitting that he'd made mistakes, and trying to atone for them.  She felt guilty, like she wasn't worthy of his concern and shrugged him off, taking a few quick steps across the room and waiting for him outside the front door.

In the few seconds she was away from his side, she composed herself, vowing that she'd learn to anticipate his curve balls so she wouldn't make an idiot of herself again.  But it never occurred to her that he wouldn't think any less of her for her tears.  It was just as well, though, because it would have only served to illustrate just how far away she was from the person she had wanted to be.

The more steps he took, the harder it got for him to walk.  He'd left the hospital and immediately disobeyed the doctor's orders not to exert himself.  She noticed that he slowed down and that he was wincing.  She offered her arm to him to lean on and he surprised her by not taking it.  She looked at him for a moment, trying to figure out why he snubbed her.  Probably because she had just snubbed him.  Unintentionally, of course, but she had.  He'd reached out to her and she'd pulled away.

She let him get a whole step in front of her before she closed the distance and put her arm around his waist.  As unsure as he seemed, he put his arm around her shoulders again quickly.  He must have been in considerable pain to let her help him right then.  She wasn't sure how a breech had formed between them so soon, but she chalked it up to the perils of building a relationship with someone you had a history of antagonism with. Made good enough sense to her.  They were at the car before he turned to look at her, blatantly having something that he wanted to say, but not sure he wanted to break the silence.  She looked at him, smiling reassuringly.

"One more thing.  I completely forgot."  His apprehensive look faded to one of amusement.

"What?"  She wasn't sure what he could possibly ask, but she didn't like the almost embarrassed way he looked.

"Could you go back upstairs and um, well, could you feed my cat?"  He was too busy staring at his shoes to see the smile on her face.

"Your cat?"  Why did the idea that he had a cat seem even more ridiculous than the idea that he had a wife and a child?

"Well, she hasn't eaten since I've been in the hospital and I don't…"  He saw her grin and stopped talking.  "What?"

She fought to keep herself from laughing, really.  And she succeeded for the most part.  "Sure.  I'll go find her."  They traded keys then, she took the key to his apartment, and he took the car keys so he could sit down.

Going back into the apartment alone, it felt like a completely different place.  Now that she knew about the wife that was dead and the child he talked about in the past tense, the huge apartment seemed terribly lonely.  She had no intention of snooping through his apartment, but the cat didn't seem to actually exist.  She tried the kitchen first, finding a box of dry cat food and carrying with her while she tried the other rooms.  She shook it as she went, figuring the cat would be starving and willing to take food from a stranger at that point.  She checked in all the windows and the other rooms until the only one that remained was the bedroom.  A room she really didn't want to go into.  But she couldn't let the poor animal starve to death, especially not considering that she was inviting its owner to stay in her apartment.

She pushed open the door, peeking around the door almost as if she was afraid of being caught.  The sun was streaming through the window, the only window in the place actually receiving light at that time in the morning.  And there was a tiny calico cat curled up on the edge of the bed, sleeping peacefully in the sun.  Scully shook the box of food once again and smiled as the cat's head jerked up.  The cat warily followed her back to the kitchen where she'd started looking for a dish to pour the food in.  The cat mewed pitifully behind her as she continued her moral dilemma of looking through his cabinets.  Finally deciding that Krycek was probably going to come looking for her if she didn't hurry up, and not wanting to have to drive to his apartment twice a day, she scooped the cat up and carried it and its food out to the car.

She expected a comment of some sort, something about what had taken her so long, why she'd brought the cat instead of just feeding it, but all she got was a previously unimaginable scene of Krycek talking to his cat, completely ignoring the woman who had brought about their happy reunion.  One more personality quirk she never would have expected: he loved his cat.  She sighed unnoticed and started the car.

About halfway back to her apartment she glanced over at the passenger's seat and saw the cat sleeping in Krycek's lap with its head nestled against his hand.  And Krycek was sound asleep himself, his head leaning uncomfortably against the window.  She thought briefly about trying to turn his head in the other direction to reduce the chance of him hitting his head but she decided against it.  It wouldn't be worth the embarrassment of explaining why she was touching his face to prevent him from getting a headache.  She'd just have to give him some aspirin later.

She felt the smile forming on her face as she drove.  She'd never understand it, but spending the last few hours with Krycek felt like it had added ten years to her life.  She felt herself growing more and more relaxed every second she spent near him.  And she liked it.

He was still sleeping when she got back home.  Taking the chance that he was exhausted and wouldn't notice, she took both of their bags out of the back and carried them in.  Then she tore through her apartment, straightening up and making sure nothing was sitting out that would embarrass her.  She checked the bathroom, putting out clean towels and then got some sheets out and put them on the couch.  She made one final stop in the kitchen and put her dishes in the dishwasher before returning to the car.  Krycek slept through the whole thing.

She got back in and reached out the shake him.  The cat looked up and hissed at her.  She glared at it and reached out again.  The cat reached out too, clawing Scully and drawing blood.  She jerked her hand back quickly.

"Ow!"  She pressed her other hand against the cut, hoping it would stop hurting.  She looked back up and saw Krycek was looking at her.  At least she didn't have to wake him up.  He took her hand and looked at it.

It was barely bleeding really, just a scratch.  But it hurt.  Content that the cat hadn't caused permanent damage, he let go of her hand and looked at the cat that had gone back to sleep.  "Sorry, she's a little over protective."

Scully nodded and opened her door.  "Come on, Krycek."  It sounded strange, even to her.  She hadn't said his name since she first saw him bleeding on the floor.  Now, using his last name seemed inappropriate.  But so did his first name.  He settled the matter quickly.

"Call me Alex, please."  She watched him look through the window into the back, perplexed as to the disappearance of his bag.

"OK, Alex, if that's even your real name, I already took the bags inside."  She hadn't expected her words to come out with such a sarcastic edge.

He moved the cat from his left hand to his right and then looked back at Scully.  "It's what I was christened with."

She laughed.  She actually laughed.  The wife, the kid, the kitten, she could accept it.  Christened?  No, no way.  Does not compute.  She walked into the building, holding the door for him.  He let her laugh until they reached her door.

"Why are you laughing at me now?"  His voice reflected that he was tired of being the source of her amusement.

She shook her head and walked inside.  "Nothing."  She noticed his disbelieving face.  "All right, it's just that the thought of you being christened seems wrong."

He set the cat on the floor and then sat down on the couch.  Two seconds later, the cat jumped up and settled on his lap again.  The way he had slumped in his seat gave away that she'd hurt his feelings.  She hadn't meant to.  She just hadn't expected his answer.  She sat down on the couch, giving him and the overprotective cat ample space.

"Look, I didn't mean anything by it, you just never struck me as the religious type."  He reached out and ran his finger along the cross hanging at her throat.

It was a few minutes before he said anything.  When he finally spoke, his voice was soft and his words sounded honest.  "I'm sorry for the things I've done, Scully.  I know it doesn't change them or make them go away, but I am sorry.  I will never go back to that life.  I know you probably won't believe me, you have no reason to, and I can't figure out why you're bothering to help me anyway, but I'm telling you the truth.  And I'm not using it as an excuse or a justification, but there were reasons for the things I did.  Things that wouldn't matter to you, just to me."  He gently played with the sleeping cat's tail.

"They must have mattered a lot, considering the things you did."  It wasn't an attempt to pry.  But he seemed like he wanted to open up.

A rueful smiled formed on his face.  "They did.  I know what you think of me, the kind of person you think I am.  But you're wrong.  I'm not like that."  He looked at her for a moment and then looked back at the cat.  "At least, I wasn't.  I don't know anymore."

She didn't know what to say, but she was looking for something, anything, that would be the right thing.  Before she got the chance to find it, he spoke again.

"I'm just tired of being someone else.  Of looking for things I'm not going to find.  Mulder might be able to look for his sister for 25 years, but I can't do it.  I know I can't.  I just don't have it in me.  I'm never going to find her."  He stood up then, disrupting the cat, and walked over to the window.  He'd said too much.  He hadn't meant to.

She followed him, stepping between him and the window.  "Who can't you find?"

He looked at her then, right in the eye, and she saw the tears.  He was crying.  She knew he was telling the truth.  He blinked, trying to stop the tears and failing.  Then he walked back to the couch and sat down.  "I met Becky when I was in college."  Scully sat down in the chair across from him and pulled her feet up underneath of her.  She had a feeling that she was in for a long story.  "We dated for four years before we got married.  We didn't have a lot of money.  We couldn't even afford a real wedding, but it didn't matter, you know?"  His eyes were filled with tears when he looked at her.  She nodded.  "We were just happy.  We were in love.  And then, right after we got married, she got a job.  At the Defense Department.  They're not exactly subtle about the background checks.  Those guys tormented us for six months before Becky actually started work.  She never told me what she did, she only said she wasn't allowed to talk about it.  She worked these impossibly long  hours, went away for weeks at a time… I never knew where she was or when she was coming home or if she was coming home.  She changed when she worked there.  She wasn't the same woman.  But then, after two years, she came home one night and told me she had quit."  He was looking right at her, but she had a feeling he didn't even see her.  He smiled for a moment.  "I had never been so happy.  She went back to being herself.  Things were fine.  She had found another job, this time in a doctor's office.  Well, that's what she told me.  Ali was born a few months after Becky had quit.  Everything seemed fine.  And then the floor fell out from under me.  Becky went to work one day and didn't come home.  That night I saw her on the news, wanted by the FBI for some federal crime or something.  I think I knew then, but I denied it.  She had a two month old baby, she worked in a doctor's office… I thought it was ridiculous.  I kept waiting for her to come home.  The next morning, police were at the door with a search warrant.  I overheard them talking, apparently, they'd found Becky and her car at the bottom of a lake.  They never even told me that she was dead.  I didn't know what they were looking for, I still don't.  But I sat there and watched them, holding Ali, waiting for someone to tell me something."

Scully moved from the chair to the couch and reached for his hand.  She could tell how hard it was for him to tell her what had happened.  He squeezed her hand hard and continued to talk.

"A few hours later, they started to question me, tried to take Ali away, but I wouldn't let them.  I was a kid.  I'd just found out that my wife, who had lied to me all that time, was dead.  They never believed a word I said.  They eventually left after they'd destroyed everything in the house.  Every day after that for six months they came by, sometimes the cops, sometimes the FBI, sometimes guys who never identified themselves or their agency.  They'd always ask me if I'd heard from Becky, which I didn't understand because she was dead, or if she'd ever told me anything about the project.  I didn't know what they were talking about and I told them that.  Then they stopped coming.  I thought maybe everything would be all right after that.  But then I started getting things in the mail.  The first few I sent back.  None of them were for me or Becky.  They were all to names I'd never heard of.  But after a few days, I got suspicious.  I started opening them.  They never made any sense, but I stopped thinking they were a mistake.  On the last page of each there would always be a scribbled phone number or address or something.  In Becky's writing.  I could never find anything out about them, they never led me anywhere, but I realized that Becky was still alive.  I tried to make sense of the stuff, but I couldn't.  And then one day, I got an envelope with only one piece of paper in it.  It said 'run.'  And I did.  I was scared out of my mind.  The envelope hadn't been mailed, it was just left on the porch.  I grabbed Ali and the papers that Becky had sent me and ran.  I stopped in a motel room that night and there was another story on the news. They'd found Becky.  Alive.  They showed the FBI taking her into a building and it was definitely her."

He paused, letting go of her hand, and she saw that the tears were back.  "When I woke up, Ali was gone.  I knew she wasn't just kidnapped but I had no idea why they hadn't killed me.  I wish they had.  I checked the car, looking for the papers, to see if they'd found them too."  He grabbed her hand again, squeezing until tears sprang to her eyes, but he didn't let go.  "I found Becky's body in the trunk.  They'd tortured her and left her there for me to find and then stolen my baby."

The tears in her eyes had nothing to do with her hand anymore.  She did understand at that point.  She understood why he'd done the things he had.  She couldn't blame him.  He hadn't even wanted to be involved.

"That's when I decided to join the FBI.  I hoped I'd be able to find something out.  I got a lot of strange looks from people when they heard my name, but I didn't know why.  I had been out of the academy for almost a day when a group of men approached me and started asking how much I wanted to find my daughter.  They gave me a name, he gave me another name, he sent me to Blevins, who'd been expecting me the whole time.  He fed me lines, sent me on a wild goose chase.  I tried to quit once and a guy threatened me that Ali could end up like Becky if I didn't behave myself.  I did as I was told.  It was a few months after that hen I was assigned to work with Mulder."  He noticed suddenly how tightly he'd been gripping her hand and let it go.  "I realize now how dumb it was, but I didn't know you then."

"Me?"  She'd always assumed the whole thing was about Mulder, and her only by extension.

"Yeah, it had nothing to do with Mulder.  They wanted to make sure you didn't go back to working with him.  They told me that you were involved in 'the project' and that if anyone knew where Ali was it was you."  No wonder he'd helped them to get to her.  He thought she'd taken his baby.  She couldn't blame him.  She would have done the same thing.  "When I met you, you were doing an autopsy.  I could barely keep my lunch down and you and Mulder were joking around and I decided they were telling me the truth.  I thought you had her.  I thought you were behind Becky's death and Ali's disappearance and I was willing to do anything to get back at you.  That was their plan all along."  He stood up again and walked away from her.  He still felt guilty over the trap he'd fallen into.  "It was too late to do anything to stop them by the time I realized what I'd done.  I realized that I had done the same thing to you and Mulder that someone had done to Becky and Ali.  I had been one of those people who knew what was going on and said nothing about it and didn't try to help either of you."  He looked out the window and up towards the sky, like he was seeking forgiveness from above.  "I'm so sorry for what I did to you.  I had no idea that you were just a victim like I was.  I'm sorry."

The cat had gotten upset with Krycek for being tossed off his lap so many times and chose to curl up on Scully instead.  "I'm sorry, Alex.  I really had no idea."

"It doesn't matter.  No matter what my reasons were, I had no right to hurt you.  I took my anger out on you and you didn't know anything about it.  Most of the things that happened to you wouldn't have if I had stayed out of it."

Picking the cat up, she walked over to Krycek and smiled at him.  "Even if you had stayed out of it, they would have found someone else who wouldn't have needed a reason and everything would still have happened.  And whoever they found probably would never have thought anything of it.  He never would have been sorry for doing it."

"But that doesn't make it OK.  It'll never be OK.  I sold my soul, Scully, and now that I want it back, I can't have it."  He took the cat out of her hands and set it on the floor.  Then he pulled Scully into his arms, burying his face in her hair.  "I know I can never make it up to you, but I want you to know how terribly sorry I am.  That's why I looked for you until I found where they were keeping you.  That's why I broke in and went to see you.  That's why I held you and eventually carried you out of there.  I turned away from them and I know I'll never get Ali back, but there was a good chance that she was already dead.  You were still alive.  And I decided that with the choice between maybe saving her and definitely saving you, I should save you."

She didn't recognize her own whispered voice.  "You must have rethought that choice."

He squeezed her against him harder, until she wasn't sure she would be able to breath, and then he relaxed a little.  "I did.  But I've never been sorry for the choice I made, Scully."

She was quiet, hugging him back for a few minutes.  Then she pulled back slightly.  "If I have to call you Alex, then you have to call me Dana."

The sound of glass shattering made both of them jump.  They walked out to the kitchen and found the cat staring out of one of Scully's cabinets with a broken mug on the floor.  Krycek stepped forward and tried to pull the cat free.  The cat fought him every step of the way, very nearly knocking another mug down.

"Just leave her, Alex.  She'll come out on her own."

"If you're sure."  He gave up and let go of it.

"I'm not, but you're not getting anywhere."  He made a face at her, she noticed that the tension had completely disintegrated.  She felt completely at ease with him.

"Her name's Callie."  At Scully's raised eyebrow, he continued.  "I didn't name her."

"Uh huh.  Course you didn't."  It had to be the oldest name in the book for a calico cat.

"No, really, I found her and that name was on her collar.  And when I called the owner, the number had been disconnected."

As if aware of the topic of conversation, Callie jumped out of the cabinet and wound her way around Krycek's legs.  "She used to sleep on Ali's bed at night.  She got upset whenever anyone went near the baby."

Callie's pathetic meow reminded Scully that she'd never fed her.  So she got the food and poured some into a bowl, setting it on the floor so Callie could get to it.  They watched the cat eat for a few minutes.  She felt completely relaxed, yet she still didn't know what to say.  Krycek walked back into the living room and sat down on the couch.  For lack of anything better to do, Scully followed.

"Any house rules I should know about?"

What was it with that devilish glint in his eyes?  "Planning on throwing a party?"  She settled beside him on the couch, a good two feet between them.  "Um, not really, just don't answer the phone and door and if I get really mad all of a sudden, undo whatever you've just done. OK?"  She offered him the remote.

He took it and switched on the TV.  "Sounds fair to me."  He looked around, noticing for the first time the sheets and blanket she'd left for him.  "I sleep here?"

She nodded and then got up, remembering that she needed to check her messages.  Just in case Skinner had said no.  She pressed the button and waited for the machine to rewind, while Krycek spread out the sheet and stretched out. She lowered the volume as far as she could before she hit the play button.  No need for Krycek to hear Mulder yelling at her over him.  There were only two messages, both were from Mulder and both had been left within minutes of each other.  The first was him reporting that he'd located her wallet.  The second was merely a request for her to call him, but reading between the lines, she knew he'd just checked his email and knew she was mad.  She glanced at Krycek, who was doing a good impression of being asleep, and then walked back to her bedroom and called Mulder.  She might as well face the music sooner.

For some reason, he didn't answer the phone in his office and she didn't feel like trying his cell phone.  He was probably in Skinner's office getting yelled at over her request.  Callie jumped up and sat on Scully's stomach and Scully didn't want to move her.  She closed her eyes and promised herself she'd only take a short nap before trying Mulder again.

It was dark when she woke up.  The cat was still sleeping, and something smelled absolutely wonderful.  She pushed the cat off her and walked out to the kitchen, finding Krycek stirring something on the stove.  She stepped closer and confirmed whatever he was cooking was the source of the delicious smell.  He smiled when he noticed her.

"Morning sleepyhead."

"Shut up."  She smiled back and he knew she was just teasing.  She peered over the rim of the pot he was stirring.  "What is that?"

"It's just spaghetti sauce."  He lifted out the wooden spoon and offered a taste to her.

"That's the best spaghetti sauce I've ever had."  He smiled.  "Why doesn't it taste like that when I make it?"  He smiled again.

"Maybe because you don't have my secret recipe."

She looked around and saw that the counter was littered with a veritable garden of dissected vegetables.  She narrowed her eyes at him and he promised to clean up after himself.  "So, what did you put in there?"

He lifted the spoon out again and tasted it for himself.  "If I told you  it wouldn't be secret, now would it?"

She smiled again.  "Fine, then, since you won't tell me what's in it, then you have to do all the dishes."

"My idea of doing the dishes is throwing the paper plates in the trash."  Callie wondered into the room and hopped on the counter, found a sinister looking mushroom and attacked it, eventually chasing it out of the room.  "Callie's idea of doing the dishes is pulling the plates back out of the trash and licking all the food off them.  So, which one of us would you rather have doing the dishes?"

"I have your gun, Alex.  I took it from you when I found you on my floor.  I'm armed, have extensive self defense training, and have another gun hidden in this apartment.  You have stitches in your side.  How angry do you really feel it would be a good idea to make me?"

He dipped his finger into the pot after he'd lifted it off the burner and then smeared the sauce on her cheek.  "You have spaghetti sauce on your face."

Like she didn't know.  What was he doing?  She folded her arms over her chest and pouted.  "Clean it off."  She had meant with a dish towel.

But when she felt his breath at her ear, it occurred to her that she should have specified that part about the dish rag.

"With pleasure."  She could hear the smile on his face, but she couldn't see it, not with his face next to hers.  Then she felt him shift his position and kiss her cheek.  She froze, staring at a thread on his sweater, her eyes wide as saucers.  He took her immobility as tacit permission and carefully licked at the sauce until it was gone.  Then he stepped back, and began serving out two portions of spaghetti, expecting her to shoot him any second.

Her brain recovered before her body did and it gave her a few minutes to think while her racing heart convinced itself to slow down.  He was trying to keep her off balance, advancing toward her and then retreating, back and forth until she admitted it.  But she wasn't about to admit it.  She could play back.  She grinned to herself, and got out two bowls to make salads.

She waited until he wasn't holding anything that was liable to break if he dropped it before she opened her mouth.  "You have beautiful eyes, Alex."  She heard the clang as the spoon hit the floor and smiled.  He hadn't been expecting a come back.

"What?"  He hadn't been expecting a compliment either.

"Oh, come on, you must know that."  She looked up and caught his positively awestruck face.  "But you don't, do you?"

He shook his head.  "No one's ever said… Thank you.  It means a lot coming from you."

She shrugged.  "No, it doesn't mean anything.  It's a statement of fact."  She went back to the salads.  "I thought so even when I wanted you dead."

He smiled, taking it to mean that she no longer wanted him dead.  "Yeah, maybe, but you wouldn't have told me then."

"No, but I wouldn't have let you kiss me either."  Had she really just said that?

"Would you let me kiss you now?"  Obviously, she had.

She'd meant to throw him, and here, she'd just dug a little hole and jumped in.  "I just did."

"Oh, I was talking about a real kiss."  Little hole?  Big hole.  She meant big fucking huge hole.

She decided to concentrate on keeping herself from blushing when she noticed his approach.  She had to keep talking or he would kiss her and then she'd have dug herself an entire trench to hide in.  "Um?"

"Well?"  Were those his hands on either side of her or was she hallucinating?

"Well what?"  Playing dumb had never worked before, but there was something about a person breathing in her ear that rendered her vocabularyless.

His words were barely a whisper, yet delivered from so close to her ear it sounded like a shout.  "Well, can I kiss you?"

"Um."  It was better than well.  He moved his hands from either side of her and she thought that maybe she'd been hallucinating.  But then he took hold of her shoulders and turned her around, lacing his fingers back into her hair and forcing her to look at him.

"I guess there's only one way to find out."  He leaned in to kiss her and her limbs finally remembered how to react.  Just before his lips touched hers, she pushed him back and started to pace.

"I um, no, I don't… This isn't… um?"  When he realized that she wasn't planning on forming a complete thought, he tried.

"I'm sorry.  I shouldn't have."  Then he turned and started to walk away.

"No, wait."  He spun around, his hopefulness making her smile.  "I didn't mean… It's not you."  There.  That made sense.

"You mean?"

She smiled.  "Slow down.  Just slow down."

He smiled and walked back over to her.  "That I can do."  He lifted her hand to his face and kissed her palm.  "Whenever, if ever, you're ready…"

She smiled back and nodded.  "Let's eat.  I'm starved."

The rest of dinner passed uneventfully.  Both of them were already about to jump out of their skins and had no desire to do anything to upset the delicate balance.  After they were finished, Scully started to load the dishwasher.  He stopped her, taking the plates out of her hands and ordering her to leave the room.  She looked at him for a moment, then took the plates back and continued with her task.

He took the next set out of her hands and she tried staring at him again.  "I believe you told me to do the dishes."

She smiled at him and nodded.  "I don't care.  It doesn't matter to me."  She grabbed their glasses and tried to set them in the sink.  He stopped her by putting his hands on her shoulders, waiting until she stopped moving before taking the glasses from her.

"If I ever want you to trust me, I have to keep my promises.  And I said I'd do the dishes."

Not to be dissuaded, she started to clean up the mess he'd left on the counter, salvaging the vegetables that Callie hadn't already conquered.  "You only have to keep the important promises.  I don't mind helping with this mess."  She smiled and kept working until he stepped behind her, blocking her from moving any further.

"All promises are important."  He took hold of her shoulders again and steered her back into the living room, pushing towards the couch.  "Now sit down and don't worry about it."  He disappeared back into the kitchen.

All of thirty seconds later, she marched back into the kitchen, not even letting him speak.  "Someone in this room just had an 8 hour nap.  The other one has been out of the hospital for 12 hours.  Which one do you think ought to be doing the cleaning?"

He smiled at her, a warm and very welcoming smile that actually made her smile back.  "Why do I have the feeling that I'm not going to win here?"

She went back to her previous duty of cleaning the counter.  "Because you're not."  He gave up and let her help.

The dishwasher was running happily and all the food was put away twenty minutes later.  Scully had just barely formulated the thought that she had no idea what to do next when the doorbell rang.  Krycek looked at her, not sure what to do.  She panicked.

She scooped up his bag and the sheets she'd let for him, threw them at him, and then began pushing him down the hall towards her bedroom.

"Gee, Dana, I thought you wanted to take it slow."  He was infuriating.  As infuriating as Mulder.  She scowled at him.

"It's Mulder, I know it.  And if he finds you here, you're as good as dead, so I recommend shutting up.  Now stay here until I tell you."  As she shut the door behind her, she issued one last warning.  "If you say one word, I guarantee that one of us will kill you."

She quickly looked over everything, inspecting it to make sure that nothing would give away her roommate.  Satisfied that everything was properly concealed, she pulled open the door, smiling brightly and trying to exude normalcy. "Hi."

"Hi."  Mulder stood there, a steaming pizza in his hand and an apologetic smile on his face.  "I thought since we didn't get dinner the other night we could try again."

She stood back and ushered him in.  "I've already eaten, but you're certainly welcome to eat here."

His smile got wider.  "Good, more pizza for me."  He sat down on the couch, put his feet up on the coffee table and started flipping channels.

She was surprised that he wasn't upset over her not going to work, but she knew he was probably just going to wait and try to catch her off guard.  She headed for the kitchen, grabbed two sodas, and then sat next to him on the couch.  She decided to give him a taste of his own medicine, waiting until he had a mouth full of pizza before she spoke.

"Was there any other reason why you decided to stop by?"  She watched him practically choke down the pizza.

"Oh, yeah, I thought I'd just stop by to make sure Krycek wasn't moving in or anything."

Her eyes opened wide in horror before she realized he was kidding.  She tried to laugh, but her heart was racing at the mere thought that he'd find out.  There would be no explaining that Krycek was staying with her.  None.  She glanced back at Mulder, hoping that he hadn't seen through her.  But he was staring straight in front of him, obviously perplexed by something.  She followed his gaze to Callie who was happily chomping on a piece of pizza while she was standing on another one.

"When did you get a cat, Scully?"  Luckily, he didn't seem too upset that the cat had eaten part of his dinner.

"I'm cat-sitting."  For the man hiding in my bedroom.  She scooped Callie up, along with the pizza she'd half eaten and took her into the bedroom.  Her glare was enough to convince Krycek that pizza stains should not end up anywhere.

She returned to the living room and saw Mulder staring at her.  "Why was the bedroom door closed?"  He sounded suspicious.

Lie lie lie.  It was the easiest and safest way to deal with the situation.  "I thought I'd locked her back there already.  Sorry about the pizza."  The gods were laughing at her.  She was sure of it as she heard something in her bedroom fall over loudly and then a threatening growl.  She felt a guilty smile take hold of her face and refuse to let go.  Mulder looked back the hall.

"Are you sure the only thing back there is a cat?"  He'd stopped eating and was busy staring at her.

"Actually, there's a dresser and a bed and a closet and, oh yeah, I'm having a torrid affair with Skinner and he's in there trying on my nightgowns until you decide to leave."

Mulder relaxed after that.  Scully just got more and more nervous.  Normally, she wouldn't have minded letting him stay as long as he wanted, but this once, the longer he stayed, the more likely he was to find Krycek who was probably bleeding to death in her bedroom.  But she couldn't say anything without drawing attention to herself.  So she sat there, wondering why Mulder wasn't bringing up the real reason he was there.  Until he did.

He turned off the TV and then turned to face her, pulling one leg up on the couch with him.  "OK, Scully, I thought you might explain what was going on, but I guess I should have known better."

She mirrored his position and looked him straight in the eye.  Then she looked down.  "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You haven't put in for vacation days in two years, Scully.  Why?"

"Why haven't I put in for vacation days?"  She knew she was being evasive, but then again, he knew why she didn't want to go to work.

"Scully…"  It was a warning, she could tell.  He was going to get mad if she wasn't honest with him.  Or if he thought she wasn't being honest with him.

She knew Krycek was probably straining to hear what was going on and for that reason, tried to keep her voice from rising.  "Look, Mulder, unless I've been hallucinating for the past few days, things haven't been very good.  You've been swinging between holding my hand and hating my guts with no stops in between.  It's confusing and I don't like it and I can't work like that.  I thought maybe a few days would help clear the air."  She paused, giving him the chance to explain himself, but he chose not to.  "When you do something I don't like, I just have to go along with it, but you can never just believe me.  Why is that?"

"I do believe you, Scully.  It's just that when you do something so obviously wrong, like helping Krycek, I want to believe that you didn't do it just to get to me."

She jumped off the couch and began pacing.  This wasn't the time or place for this conversation.  She was pretty sure there was no time or place for this conversation.  "Well, helping Krycek doesn't seem so obviously wrong to me.  Maybe you feel differently, but I can't just stand by and let someone die, no matter what they've done in the past.  It's not my decision to make."

"OK, so you're a better person than I am, fine.  I'm just trying to figure out when you're planning on returning to work."  How was it that he was able to make her feel like she was blowing everything out of proportion.

"I will return to work immediately after you promise to never mention Krycek's name again and you swear that you will drop the last three days from your list of possible topics of conversation.  OK?"

Mulder stepped towards the door.  "Then should I pack up your stuff and send it here or would you rather come in and turn in your resignation?"

She couldn't believe that he was serious.  "Right now, I think I'd rather pull out my gun and shoot one of us so you'll stop acting like an arrogant asshole.  Somehow though, I doubt you ever will."

He was halfway out the door when he turned around.  "Oh, yeah, I almost forgot.  Skinner said that if you want more than one day off, you'll have to go in and explain the situation to him.

"You did this on purpose, didn't you?"  He had gone there with the express purpose of making her angry and she'd fallen right into his trap.  And he had known the entire time that she would have to show up for work in the morning.

He shrugged.  For him, it was as good as admitting it.  "I didn't know that you'd go off and start yelling at me."

"Me?"  She didn't even have to exaggerate the shocked expression. "You're the one who started on me.  You're the one who showed up at my door and knew this was going to happen.  This is all your fault."  She stood in front of him, her arms crossed defiantly across her chest, waiting for him to move another inch so she could slam the door in his face.  Damn him for letting Krycek see this.  Damn her for letting Krycek see this.

"I'm not doing anything.  You're the one who's defending that murdering son of a bitch!"  His voice was loud, his eyes were dark, and he was out of control.  And she was scared.  She stepped backwards, completely unsure of how to react to him.  He was angry.  Angrier than she'd ever seen him and she didn't know what had happened.

"Go home, Mulder.  Call me when you get a grip on your temper."  She'd stopped backing up, but only because she was across the room.  She didn't feel comfortable approaching him again.

Unfortunately, her discomfort was obvious.  He walked back into the room, slamming the door behind him.  "What, you afraid of me now?"  He laughed, a cruel mocking kind of laugh.  "You trust the man who killed my father, but you're afraid of me.  That's rich.  That's fucking hilarious."

She didn't have the chance to formulate her reply.  Mulder was suddenly distracted.  She looked to see what he was staring at.  Her jaw dropped open when she saw Krycek approaching her.

He completely ignored both of their astonished faces and spoke only to Scully.  "Are you all right?  Did he hurt you?"  He'd heard the angry voices and been afraid of what was going on.  Especially since Scully had sounded hurt and it was over him.

"I told you to stay back there."  She was mad at Mulder for yelling, mad at Krycek for interfering, and mad at herself for not seeing this coming.  She looked back at Mulder.  He stared back at her.  His face no longer registered the utter shock he'd felt when Krycek had casually marched into the room, but he hadn't yet recovered from it.  He blinked rapidly a few times and then looked back and forth between Scully and Krycek.

"How long has this" He pointed at them to indicate what he was referring to.  "been going on?"

Krycek stared, silently, convinced that Scully wasn't in physical danger as he had first been afraid.  With Mulder as surprised as he was, Scully didn't appear to be in any danger at all, but there really was no point in Krycek going back to hide in the bedroom anymore.

"What?"  Annoyed, she pushed Krycek away and stepped forward.  She didn't know who she was more mad at, but she did know that she didn't want to be anywhere around either one of them right then.  "How long has what been going on?"

Mulder matched her annoyed face.  "This."  He made another gesture in the air.  "You two.  How long?"

It finally clicked both Scully's and Krycek's heads.  "What?"  Delivered in unison.  Mulder managed to look even more annoyed.

"What, did you plan that?"  Leave it to Mulder to jump head first off the paranoid end.

Scully put her hands on her hips.  "Nothing is going on, nothing has been going on, and nothing will ever be going on.  Now, you're still completely unwelcome here, so I would advise you to go."  She let the insinuation that Krycek would make sure that Mulder left hang in the air.

"No?  Well, you better make sure of that."  She didn't know what Mulder's threat was supposed to mean and she had the feeling that he didn't either. "So this is it?"

She glanced at Krycek and wondered if he understood.  He didn't.  "What are you talking about?"

Mulder looked at Krycek and then back at Scully, his pure rage completely disguising the hurt.  "Me or him."

Her jaw dropped open again.  "What is this?  Some bad TV movie?  You're going to make me choose?"

"Oh, no, Scully you've already made your choice."  She didn't notice the hurt look on Krycek's face when he assumed Scully would tell him to leave.  She only noticed that, after attempting to stare her down for a long moment, Mulder turned and left, slamming the door behind him.

On cue, tears of hurt and anger and confusion filled her eyes.  She turned to Krycek.  His shoulders were already slumped and he was waiting for the dictum that he was banished from her life for good.  After a moment of not hearing anything, he looked up and met her tear filled eyes.

"Why did you come out here?"  Things were bad enough before Krycek had announced his presence.

He knew he'd done the wrong thing, but he wasn't sure why she wasn't throwing him out.  "I thought he was going to hurt you."  It was the truth.  He hoped she'd believe it.

She said nothing, just stared back at him.  Then she turned away and locked herself in her bedroom.  She didn't know if she wanted Krycek to stay or go or to chase after Mulder and force him to apologize to her.  She couldn't tell.  She couldn't make up her mind about what would fix things.  She just knew that they had gone very very wrong.

She cried herself to sleep somewhere around 2 o'clock.  When she awoke, she couldn't tell what time it was, but she could tell that it was very dark and that someone was trying to hold her arms down.  She immediately struggled, not remembering for the moment that there was anyone staying in her house.   It didn't take her long to realize that she was losing the battle, though, and relaxed, dropping her head forward and feeling herself shake.  She was terrified.

But the moment she stopped resisting, the hands stopped crushing her.  Instead, she felt strong arms wrap around her and pull her into an embrace.  His quiet, uninterpretable words soothed her and she leaned against him.  Her groggy state confused her enough that, although she knew it wasn't Mulder, she didn't know that it was Krycek.  She pulled back slightly, not wanting to leave the comfort of his arms.

He kept one arm around her, using the other hand to push her hair back from her face.  "Hey, you were having a nightmare.  Are you all right?"

She nodded, slowly getting over the shock of seeing that it was Krycek holding her.  The events of the evening were gradually returning to her memory.  No wonder she'd had a nightmare.  The scene in the living room would probably haunt her for years.

He moved his arm back to around her waist and lightly rubbed her back.  As long as she wasn't pulling away, he didn't see the harm.  Whether it was him rubbing her back or her confusion over the current mess or something else entirely, they didn't know.  But the air between them changed.  He was sitting too close to her, her face was too accepting, something gave him the courage to lean forward to kiss her and this time, she didn't deny him.

The moment his lips touched hers, she realized how very much she wanted him.  She didn't want the contact to end and when he pulled back, she chased him.  He didn't pull back again.  He was afraid of taking advantage of her emotional state.  He knew she was hurting and he didn't want to use that to get close to her.  But as it turned out, he didn't need to use anything because she welcomed the contact.

She welcomed all of it, his kisses, his comforting loving words, his touches.  She didn't think that it was wrong, it didn't feel like she was betraying anyone.  She felt like she loved him.  And it felt like he loved her.  So she didn't question it, she followed his lead and made love to him.  Eventually falling asleep safely ensconced in his arms.

She woke up again, a few hours later.  The sun was just coming up, but not quite enough to brighten the room.  She turned and looked at Krycek who was sleeping peacefully.  She didn't know what her next move would be; the last had certainly been unexpected.  Knowing there would be no more sleep for her because of her nap earlier, she carefully extracted herself from his arms.  He mumbled something that she didn't catch when she sat up and then he reached for her.  She shushed him and he stayed asleep.  She picked up the sweatshirt he'd tossed on the floor and put it on before she stood up and headed for the living room.  She turned to look back for a moment, just to assure herself that it had actually happened, and she saw Callie happily curled up in the space she'd just vacated.  She made her way out to the living room, making herself a cup of coffee and then curled up on the couch to watch the crack of dawn news program.

She knew that she had to either go to work or come up with a good reason for not being there with which to please Skinner.  She also couldn't return to work since Mulder had pretty much told her not to come back.  And there was always the fact that the man asleep in her bedroom was going to wake up.  She blinked and tried to focus on the news.  She came to the conclusion that if the traffic report was good, then she'd go to work.  Otherwise, she'd stay home, and try to come up with a slightly better excuse.

Krycek wandered out to the living room just as the traffic report came on.  She stole a few looks in his direction, but she didn't want to stare.  Neither of them knew how to act, whether to blow it off as stress and pretend it hadn't happened, or if they wanted to continue what they'd started.  She decided to see what he did and take her cue from him.  He surveyed the scene, her wearing the shirt he'd had on, stretched out on the couch, drinking coffee and watching the news, and decided that it didn't seem too dangerous.

"Snuck out of bed on me?"

She looked up and met his eye.  "Coffee's in the kitchen."  When he returned a moment later, she continued.  "I didn't want to wake you.  And Callie was being territorial."

He nodded and looked around the room, obviously perplexed by something.  "Sit up."

She was stretched all the way across the couch, but there were plenty of other places for him to sit.  Still, she did as he requested, asking as she complied.  "Why?"

Once she sat up, he sat down where her back had been and began drinking his coffee.  "So I can sit here."  He winked at her.

The casual wink was enough to produce an irrepressible smile on her face.  "Move.  I want to lay down."

He set his cup down on the end table and then pulled her back down so that she was resting across his chest, both of them being careful not to disturb his stitches.  He pressed his face close to her ear before he spoke.  "Better?"

She smiled harder and nuzzled her face into his neck.  "Mmmphhh."

He squeezed her tightly in a quick hug before relaxing and directing his attention to the news.  He caught her smug grin and didn't understand it.  "What?"

She leaned towards him and placed a tiny kiss on his chin.  "There's a terrible traffic jam this morning."  He turned his face to kiss her and both of them quickly forgot about the traffic report.

It felt strange to her.  She was very attracted to him, and part of her knew she could trust him, that he was trying to change, that he wasn't the evil man Mulder thought he was.  Yet, as easily as she trusted him, she couldn't discount Mulder's ideas.  It wasn't that she thought Krycek was lying, no, she absolutely believed him, although she could never explain why.  It was just that Mulder was so adamantly against Krycek.  Mulder was wrong about him and she knew that she had to correct that notion before she'd feel completely comfortable with Krycek.

Sadly, it was something she would have to leave the safety of Krycek's arms to achieve.  She had to go to work.  She knew it.  Krycek and Callie would probably not be too happy if she got evicted for not paying her rent and then had to go live with them.  OK, Krycek might not have a problem with it, but she still couldn't really tell whether or not Callie would appreciate it.  She sat up, reluctantly pulling away from Krycek.  He kept his arms around her tightly, but allowed her enough space to look at him

"What?"  He thought he'd done something wrong.  She could hear it in his voice.

She smiled reassuringly.  "I have to go to work."

His face fell and he relaxed his arms, giving her the freedom to stand up.  Freedom she wished she didn't have.  She missed him and he was right in front of her.  He stood up then too, stretching his arms straight above his head and yawning.

"OK, then can I take a shower?"

An unbidden thought flashed through her mind and she had to turn away to keep herself from blushing:  Alex Krycek wearing skin tight jeans was a very appealing diversion from her job and the rest of her responsibilities.  She started walking back the hall, calling back to him.

"You have all day to take a shower while I go work.  I, on the other hand, have to leave in a half hour, so I get the first shower."

"We could share…"

She laughed outright at his suggestion while she began running water for her shower.  "Yeah, but then I'd never get to work."  He didn't answer which she took to mean that he didn't object.  She picked out a suit and then took her shower, using the short time to herself to think of anything except Krycek and Mulder and the mess she'd gotten herself into.

Just under 45 minutes later, she headed for the door, pausing to see what Krycek had gotten into while she was getting ready.  She found him underneath the dining room table, in the middle of an elaborate game of some sort with Callie.  "Alex, I'm leaving now and I'll be back around 6:30, unless I get fired, which is a definitely possibility.  I trust you won't ransack the place and that you'll still be hear when I come home."

"Owwww."  Moments later, he emerged from his hiding place, rubbing the red streak on his face.  She pulled his hand away and inspected the scratch.

"She didn't break the skin, you'll live."  He took advantage of her preoccupation with looking at the scratch to kiss her on the cheek.

"I'll miss you."  The tone of his voice revealed his honesty.  "But if you don't leave, I'll never get the chance to go through all your stuff."  He smiled and walked with her to the door.

She knew he was joking, but it still made her wonder what embarrassing things she had sitting around just waiting to be discovered.  She checked his stitches, and satisfied that they were still intact, issued instructions "Take it easy today.  You've been ignoring the doctor's advice and in my experience, that's not a good thing."  He nodded, but she wasn't convinced he was going to heed the warning.  "If I so much as think you've been doing something you shouldn't have been, the invitation to stay will be revoked and you can walk back home.  With the cat."  Then she turned and left, hoping that she wasn't making a glaring error in judgment.

She checked her watch and glared at the obnoxious bumper sticker on the car in front of her.  She would have just made it to work on time, but the traffic jam hadn't cleared at all.  There was a slim chance that Mulder was stuck in it as well.  She took out her phone and dialed the office number, not really wanting their first contact following the fight to be her calling in and reporting that she was going to be late, but she didn't see a way around it.  When he didn't answer on the third ring, she disconnected the phone and thanked whoever was listening.  Even though he was headed into DC from the complete opposite direction, traffic jams as bad as the one she was caught in were contagious as people attempted to find alternate routes.  She might even beat Mulder to work, which she saw as a definite point in her favor.

By the time she made it to the door of the office, it was already quarter after nine.  Sighing, she pushed open the door and saw Mulder.  But miraculously, he was in the process of taking off his coat, letting her know that he was as late as she was.  Neither spoke, instead finding menial things with which to occupy their time.  The phone rang at 9:30 and both of them jumped.  Mulder picked it up.  She heard tell the caller to hold on and then he pushed the phone across the desk and nodded to her.  She swiped at it, annoyed that he couldn't even pretend to be civil.  She'd actually rather have him pretend that everything was fine and try to drive her insane that way than just ignoring her.  She didn't know who would be calling her, and she was irrationally afraid that it was Krycek.  But then again, Mulder's head hadn't exploded and Krycek had to have more sense than that.  It was Skinner's secretary, happily informing her that Skinner was expecting her in his office in five minutes.  She dropped the phone on Mulder's desk, almost pleased when it created a torrent of papers sliding to the floor.  The amusement was short lived though, because Mulder was staring at something in front of him and didn't notice.  Just as well, she thought, I don't have to apologize since he won't realize I did it.

Twenty minutes later, she found herself trying to explain to Skinner why she had taken a day off without having to tell him why she'd taken a day off.  It was not an easy task.  "Sir, I understand that in the future I should request vacation time in advance, but the circumstances were such that I did not have any warning myself.  I am here today and I'm not planning on taking anymore time off, so if that's all…"  She hoped that he would accept her vague answers and let it slide.  But Skinner had been caught in the traffic jam too and he didn't feel like giving her a break.

"Agent Scully, I think you and I, as well as Agent Mulder, know that this is not about your not giving adequate notice.  I don't care how many vacation days you take nor am I particularly concerned with how much notice you give.  I am, however, disturbed by the wording you used to request it and it leads me to believe that something is going on here that neither of you are telling me."

She dropped her professional stare for a millisecond and shot him an annoyed glare before slipping back into her respectful attitude.  "If you would check the time on that email, Sir, you would see that it was around 4A.M.  I believe that being on an airplane at that hour is enough to explain the disgruntled tone of the note without even considering the presence of my obnoxious partner."  She bit the inside of her lip to hide the face she wanted to make.  She hadn't meant to add that last part.  It had just slipped out.

Skinner made a great show of removing his glasses, pushing his chair back from his desk, and walking around to sit down in the chair beside hers.  She continued to stare at the chair he'd originally been in.  "Scully, what's going on?"  She shifted uncomfortably in her seat and crossed her legs.  Maybe if she pretended he hadn't said anything he would pretend too.  "Agent Scully?"  Maybe not.  "You have the choice of talking to me or the bureau psychiatrist.  It's up to you."  He settled back in the chair, indicating to her that he wasn't going to let her leave until she gave in.

"Agent Mulder and I were having a difference of opinion and I was rather upset with him.  I know that it was exceedingly unprofessional to resort to childish games and I will not do so in the future."  No need to be all that honest, really.

"So this difference of opinion is all cleared up then?"

She dared to look in his direction while she lied.  "Absolutely, Sir."  She watched him nod and then sit forward on the edge of his chair and pull a piece of paper off his desk.  He looked it over and then handed it to her.

"Since everything is all cleared up, I assume you can explain this to me?"

As she read the official transfer request that Mulder had submitted for her she didn't have to hide her surprise.  The moment she'd realized what it was, her mind protectively refused to process what it meant so that she would be able to finish her conversation with Skinner without falling on the floor.  "Certainly.  It's a transfer request."  She handed it back to him.  She'd seen her name, she'd seen Mulder's signature, there was nothing more that she needed to see.

"I haven't processed this yet."  He waited and got no response.  "I was hoping you might be able to explain to me why Mulder came in here last night at eight and insisted on giving it to me in person?"

Perhaps part of her mind had understood what it meant and it loosened the sarcastic tendency that always flared up when Skinner tried to drag things out of her.  "I'm sure he wanted to be sure that you got it.  Before your secretary had the chance to start spreading rumors."

"You don't seem at all surprised by this."  Wow, she had actually fooled him.  Now, she just had to keep it up.

"I'm not."  If she got through this and ever rose to a position of authority, she was going to insist that everyone in her office be hooked up to lie detectors.

"Are you aware of the reasons Agent Mulder cited for your immediate transfer?"

She glanced at the paper and could just make out the wildly messy handwriting that betrayed when Mulder was irate.  It was also usually illegible.  Maybe she stood a chance.  "I'm aware of the reasons, although what he wrote on that form may not reflect them."

Skinner reached for his glasses.  She rolled her eyes while he wasn't looking.  If he was putting on his glasses, it meant he wanted to quote the reasons.  And if the reasons were worth quoting and Mulder had been that upset writing it, she could only imagine what he'd finally decided on.  He cleared his throat and began listing some of the reasons, pausing to skip over some of them.

"Refusal to pursue viable leads, flagrant insubordination, failure to support agents in authority, misuse of official stationary?"  She had to crack a smile.  He had to have been referring to the paper airplane collection she had.  "The list goes on from there, but I believe we get the idea."

She nodded.  "Oh, yes, Sir, it's crystal clear.  He doesn't like me anymore.  May I leave now?"  Luckily he was more shocked than angered at her statement.

"No, you're not going anywhere.  I have worked with you on several occasions and haven't witnessed anything to this effect, especially not that one about the stationary, and I was thinking of asking Agent Mulder to join us to further illustrate his reasoning."

She found the courage to meet his unrelenting stare.  "I'm not sure that would be a very good idea.  Judging from the argument I had with Agent Mulder last night, I would dare say that inviting him to the party might be a very bad move.  But if you insist…"

He either missed or ignored her condescending tone.  "I don't insist.  If you would like to explain this, it won't be necessary to involve him at all."

She decided that her job was probably relatively secure if Skinner was discussing this with her rather than filing an official complaint about her attitude.  "Look, I appreciate your concern, but you really should think about this.  If Mulder wants to get rid of me so badly and I'm not trying to stop him, do you really think it's going to solve anything by forcing us to work together?"

"I agree with you that the reasons he's listed here have nothing to do with the real issue.  And because of something that he said to me last night, I think this problem might be one that we can solve rather than just avoiding it."

She looked at him warily.  She didn't like the sound of something Mulder had said to him in the mood Mulder had been in that made Skinner think he could fix things.  "And what exactly did he say to you regarding this situation?"  Maybe she was just being paranoid.

"He said that you've become involved with Krycek."

Her mouth dropped open.  She could very easily picture Mulder doing all of this except for saying that.  Her voice came out in a hoarse whisper.  "He told you that?"  It hadn't even been true when he'd said it.  And the fact that it was now didn't make her feel any better about defending herself.

Skinner stood up again and walked back to his side of the desk, sitting down in his chair and emanating Assistant Director Skinner.  He took his glasses back off and pinched the bridge of his nose to avoid having to look at her while replying.  "No, actually, he came storming in here and said 'she's screwing the little rat' and then threw the transfer request at me."

Come to think of it, she could see him doing that.  Scully shifted her gaze to the door, attempting to develop telepathic powers that would make the door swing open and create a vortex that would suck her right out of her chair.  A few silent moments later, it had become painfully obvious that he expected some sort of reply.

"I have nothing to say to that.  My personal life should not be a matter of discussion between my boss and my partner."

"You're not going to deny it?"  He couldn't hide his disbelief.

"What would the point be in that?"  She folded her hands together in her lap, feeling like a little girl in the principal's office.  She knew she'd never convince either Mulder or Skinner that Krycek was any different than they remembered.  And if they would rather believe that she'd changed sides than they would that he'd changed sides, she would let them.  Just so long as it didn't cost her job.  "Is there another department available right now for me to transfer to?"

"So it's true?"  He was having a worse time with this than Mulder had.  Of course, that was probably because Mulder had created it in his own head and Skinner was hearing it, not hearing it be denied, from her.

"Whether or not it's true doesn't matter.  If Mulder believes it, the rest of us have to take it for Gospel truth.  And if you don't mind, I don't think it's any more appropriate for us to discuss my personal life than it is for you and Agent Mulder to."

She watched helplessly as Skinner pressed the call button and instructed his secretary to get Mulder.  Her skin paled considerably, and the fact that she hadn't eaten caught up with her.  She started to feel faint and the fact that she was holding her breath wasn't helping.  But by the time she realized it, it was too late.  Her head started to feel heavy and the edges of her vision faded to black.  She heard Skinner say her name, but she couldn't answer him, choosing to close her eyes and let the world go black instead.  It seemed a million times more welcoming than her reality.

She woke up ten minutes later to Mulder's gentle, yet incessant, shaking.  She met his eyes, saw his fear, and then struggled to sit up.  His hands braced her shoulders. refusing to let her up.  She looked around, trying to get her bearings, remembering something about needing to get out of there before Mulder got there.  Too late.  He watched her turn her head and let her try to figure out what had happened.

She gave up, and squinted up at him.  The light was a little too bright to allow her to open her eyes fully.  "What happened?"

Skinner's voice cause her to jerk her head to Mulder's right.  She'd forgotten about him.  But pieces of the conversation came back to her when she realized she was still in Skinner's office.  "You passed out, Agent Scully."

Her face was already flushed, so neither of them noticed her blush.  She tried to brush Mulder's hands away, and succeeded for the most part.  But she saw that he was sitting on the edge of the couch that she was stretched out on.  He didn't look like he was about to let her move.

"Let me up, Mulder."  She tried to sit up then, but Mulder didn't move.  She was given the option of sitting up with not quite three inches between their faces or laying back down.

Mulder picked something up off the floor and held it in front of her.  "You're not going anywhere until you eat something."

She ignored the offered crackers.  "I can't eat laying down or I'll choke to death."

"If I let you sit up, you're going to walk out of here and refuse to eat and probably pass out in the hallway.  Just eat them."  He tore open the package and put one in her hand.

She took it and looked at it.  She wasn't hungry.  And even if she was, the last thing she felt like doing was whatever Mulder told her.  She sat up, refusing to look at Mulder as she tried to swing her legs around to stand up.  He caught them with one hand, pushing her knees back down.  Absently she heard Skinner's exasperated sigh.

"Mulder, I'm sure Skinner wants us out of here and I'm not really looking forward to continuing this inane argument, so knock it off."  She turned away from him as well as she could with him sitting so close to her and aimed her next words at Skinner.  "Is there a place available for me to transfer?  I don't think you ever answered my question."

Both men looked confused, Mulder slightly more so.  "So that's what this was about?"

Skinner didn't answer, just walked back to his desk and started working on something, leaving Mulder and Scully to face each other.  "What did you think he called me up here for?  To discuss the weather?"

He looked down, guilt radiating off his face.  She was sitting on top of him and she could barely hear his reply.  "I'm sorry.  I was upset last night and I didn't mean it."

"Don't bother, Mulder.  I'm not going to forget it and neither is Skinner."

Mulder stood up finally, and walked over to Skinner's desk.  It gave her the chance she'd been waiting for.  She stood up and took about two steps before she felt her legs shake.  She tossed herself into one of the chairs, thankfully circumventing any attention being paid to her.  She ate the cracker that was still in her hand and hoped that Mulder didn't notice.  He was sorting through the papers on Skinner's desk, much to Skinner's dismay, and located the one he was looking for.  Then he tore it up and tossed it in the trash.  Skinner didn't look too surprised.

"I think we can all forget it now, right?"  Mulder was watching Scully, and had noticed that the cracker was gone.  He handed her the rest of the pack, which she accepted and ate without mention.  Scully was watching Skinner though, and he was shaking his head.

"Agent Mulder, while you and Agent Scully may be willing to forget it, I am not about to let you waste my time with your little games unless you provide me with a damn good explanation."

Mulder sank into the chair next to Scully.  He glanced at her, and seeing her permission, launched into the story.  Scully sat silently, not negating a single word Mulder said.  She didn't need to.  He gave a perfect accurate rendition of the events to Skinner.  He left out his own desire to let Krycek die and his reaction to seeing Krycek in Scully's apartment.  When he was done, Skinner turned to Scully.

"Am I to understand then that you are harboring a known felon in your apartment?"

Why did it have to seem so wrong when he said it?  She took a deep breath.  It was probably insane to try and convince them, but if she didn't try, she and Krycek would be sharing a jail cell.

"I know that he has done some terrible things.  I'm not defending him nor am I condoning his actions.  I would like for both of you to hear me out, though, and perhaps you will come to the same understanding that I have."  She waited, and when neither voiced any objections, she spoke.  "He told me a story.  A story I don't think he could have made up in such detail in the time it took him to tell me.  And I don't think he was faking the tears either."  She recounted the story Krycek had told her, hoping that they would believe it too.

Mulder stared at her, completely expressionless.  "What makes you think any of it was true?"

"I saw pictures of him, Mulder.  With the wife, with the baby, I know they existed, although I have no proof that anything happened the way he said it did.  I can't explain it, Mulder, I just believe him.  And I already told you that I remembered part of it before he told me.  I remember him trying to help me."

Mulder shook his head, appearing at the very least, to be considering her words.  Skinner had picked up the phone and was trying to locate Krycek's personnel file.  He looked up, nodding slightly towards Scully, but speaking to Mulder.

"I do remember something about a wife and a child.  I did the final interview before he was hired."  In answer to Mulder's accusatory glare, he cleared his throat and continued.  "I gave my recommendation, but the final decision wasn't mine, Mulder.  And the other people he interviewed with, I don't think they could have been bought out.  The interviewers are randomly selected from a group of high ranking agents, there's no way it could have been rigged unless someone approached everyone.  He was sincere, or he seemed like it.  He was very interested in finding out about the kid, but if I remember correctly, Mulder, you were interested in finding out about an unsolved case as well."

Scully looked down at her hands twisting in her lap.  She was making a lot of work for people and she hoped it wasn't all just going to wind up proving her wrong.  And if it did, she was going to have a lot more to deal with.  She glanced at Mulder.  He was staring at her.  She looked away.

"Well, since no one is being transferred, forcibly or otherwise, right now, how about you both go back to your office and I'll let you know if I find anything out."

It wasn't a request.  Mulder and Scully stood silently and left the office.  The silence followed them until long after they were back in their office.  Mulder seated himself at his desk, Scully in the chair across from him.  They didn't have anything to work to work on right then, and Skinner wouldn't be too happy if they decided to dig up something that would involve leaving the office.  Scully scooped up the pile of papers she'd knocked over earlier that morning and handed the stack to Mulder.  He hadn't noticed they were even gone, and started looking around for some place to stack them.

"Scully?"  He was standing there, the papers still in his hands, looking around distractedly.

"Yes?"  She couldn't tell from his tone whether or not he was mad.

He put the papers on the floor and then walked over to sit beside her.  "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine."  She wasn't sure what he was getting at and she wasn't sure that she'd even want to know.

"When you fainted, it was just because you hadn't eaten or something, right?"  She shrugged.  "You're not having nosebleeds again or anything are you?  You're feeling OK, right?"

His voice broke on the last word.  She reached out to lay a hand on his arm.  She could see the whole traumatic event unfolding in his mind.  He probably thought the cancer was back, and he was having her transferred while she was dying.  Which meant that his forgiveness was contingent on her imminent death.  She pulled her hand back and tried not to feel disappointed.

"I'm fine, Mulder.  So you might as well go back to hating me."

He moved out of the chair and squatted in front of her, much like he had done at the airport.  But this time he wasn't doing it in anger.  She leaned forward and let him run a finger along her cheek.

"I don't hate you.  I'm just afraid of him, Scully.  I'm afraid of what he's done to you, of what he's going to do.  For your sake, I really hope he was telling the truth.  I don't want to see you hurt, physically or emotionally."

She was mesmerized by the look in his eyes and she could only nod to convey her understanding.  He was driving her crazy with his behavior.  She couldn't tell how he was going to react to anything she did, but when he was acting like this, she couldn't doubt him or be mad at him or resist him.  She put her arms around his neck and hugged him.  God help the man if he was lying.

She spoke into his shirt collar, not quite wanting to face him.  "If you don't want to see me hurt, why do you do this to me?"

She felt his hands run through her hair and then what quite possibly could have been a kiss on top of her head.  He stood up abruptly, leaving her scrambling to get back into her chair before she fell on the floor.

"I don't know, Scully.  I don't know."

He must have suddenly remembered something important because he turned around and walked out without looking back.  Scully sat there and stared at the opened door.

When Mulder came back, he acted like nothing had happened.  He wasn't the emotional, extremely concerned man who'd walked out the door.  He sat down at his desk and began working on something, completely ignoring her.  He may not have been trying to hurt her, but he was certainly trying to confuse her.  He was also doing a damn good job of it.  She did the same, went about trying to something productive.  Around 5:30, Skinner called and reported that all the records of Krycek ever having worked there were gone.  She laughed when she heard it, not from amusement but from the irony of it.  There was no proof that Krycek had been there except for the few cases he'd signed his name to.  Mulder didn't act surprised or even all that upset over it.  But she knew he wouldn't be convinced even if he was presented with the same pictures she had been.  She wasn't sure he would ever be convinced.

At 6, she gave up and went home, amazed at how tired she was after a day of doing nothing.  Traffic was light, she assumed all the people who had been caught in the traffic that morning had to stay late to make up for it.  It was almost a half hour later when she walked down the hall to her apartment.

She knew something was wrong before she opened the door.  She could just feel it.  Placing one hand on her gun and the other on the knob, she gently eased the door open.  She told herself she was going to see Krycek sitting on the couch, maybe even Callie running out the door past her, but that everything would be fine.

It wasn't.  The place was in shambles.  Nothing except her couch was left right side up, and even the cushions had been torn out of it.  She pulled out her gun and quickly checked to make sure she hadn't interrupted anyone.  No one was there.  Not even Krycek.  She wasn't hurt by his betrayal.  She didn't even think he'd had anything to do with it.  She put her gun away and called Mulder.  Her computer was destroyed, as was most of her things.  The things that weren't destroyed were all over the floor.  Whoever had done this was thorough.  And judging from the state of the furniture, they'd made quite a lot of noise.  She decided to see if her neighbors had heard anything.

The first one didn't answer, they were only around late at night to play their radio as loud as possible.  The apartment across the hall wasn't rented and that left her with one door.  The elderly woman who lived on the other side of her was not a happy camper.  She would probably yell and scream and deny hearing anything but still complain about her.  But she was concerned about Krycek.  Someone had been trying to kill him.  He hadn't acted that concerned about it, but he must have known they come back.  And she should have known it too.  She paled when it occurred to her that Krycek might be dead.

The woman opened the door a few inches, the safety chain still fastened, and hollered at Scully, not seeing or caring about Scully's dilemma.  "I didn't hear anything.  You leave me alone!"

The door slammed and Scully waited a beat before knocking again.  "Please, Mrs. Sylenski, please just open the door."  She didn't expect it to work.  When nothing happened, she tried again.  "I need to ask you something, please open the door."

The woman spoke through the closed door.  "Leave me alone before I call the cops! You're crazy! I didn't see anything.  Just go away!"

"Mrs. Sylenski, I am the cops.  Please open the door."  She was pleading, but it worked.  The door cracked open.

"Let me see your badge."

She sighed and got it out, having been through this with her neighbors before.  They all knew she was in the FBI and their revenge for the odd hours and company she kept was to refuse to talk to her. Normally, she wouldn't mind, but she needed to know if Krycek was hurt.  The woman spent ten minutes examining the badge, which Scully knew was just for show since she wasn't wearing her glasses and couldn't see a thing.  Seemingly satisfied, she opened the door the rest of the way and allowed Scully's entrance.  But she stayed at the door, looking over her shoulder to keep an eye out for Mulder.

"Did you hear anything from my apartment today?  Did you see anyone around who isn't usually?"

Mrs. Sylenski disappeared around the corner and returned a second later with Callie in her arms.  "You mean other than that boy who's staying with you?"

Callie fought both the woman and Scully when they tried to hold her, but climbed happily into Mulder's arms when he offered them.  "What's going on, Scully?"

"Go look at my apartment."  She turned back to Mrs. Sylenski, not happy at the disapproving frown on her face.  "That boy that's staying with me is older than me.  And yes, I mean other than him, did you see anyone else around here?"

"I'm not a dumb old lady, I know a boy when I see him."  Scully rolled her eyes and decided that the woman was just lonely and wanted someone to talk to about anything.  "I didn't see anything.  I heard so much noise there, I thought the building was going to fall down.  I went to bang on the door and nobody said anything.  There was no more noise and I came out again and thought I'd check to make sure everything was all right.  The door was open and the cat was out in the hallway.  I don't know anything else."

Scully nodded.  That was a lot of help.  "Did you hear anything else?  Did you hear voices, any arguing?  Did it sound like there was more than one person around?"  She didn't want to believe that Krycek had done it.  She just didn't want to.

"I heard angry voices, sounded like an argument of some kind.  I thought it was just the TV.  That was before all the noise."

She squeezed her eyes closed and pleaded with whoever was listening.  Please, please don't let him be involved.  She didn't want Krycek to have been the one who destroyed her apartment like that, but she also didn't want him injured, maybe dying, somewhere either.  "Did you hear what they were arguing about?"

Mrs. Sylenski looked shocked.  "Certainly not! I don't listen in on anyone's business.  I don't hear nothing I'm not supposed to."

Mulder had rejoined Scully's side, without the cat.  While Mrs. Sylenski was ranting about not eavesdropping, Mulder bent down and whispered to Scully.  "I'm going to kill that son of a bitch.  He's not getting away with this."

She shot him a glare.  "Mulder, there's no proof he did it.  He could be hurt, he could be dead…"  She turned away, not able to handle another fight with Mulder right then.  "OK, thank you, Mrs. Sylenski.  Please let me know if you remember anything else."

Mrs. Sylenski put a finger to her lips.  "Now, wait just one second."  She turned around and looked at her TV.  "I… Just let me think for a moment."  Scully nodded her agreement.  "All that noise was early, before lunch.  I was looking at my story this afternoon and I heard a great big commotion out in the hall."

"What type of commotion, Mrs. Sylenski?"  She was quickly losing patience with the woman.

"I didn't check because my story wasn't on a commercial, but I know I saw those flashing lights around then.  Some type of ambulance siren, too.  I didn't hear nothing they were saying, I was watching my TV."

She turned to Mulder, obviously frightened by this latest revelation.  He thanked the woman and led her back to her apartment, replacing the cushions on the couch so she could sit down.  He pick up the phone and she realized that he was calling the police.

Oh, God, he's hurt.

"What?"  Mulder walked back into the room.  "I didn't catch what you said."

She hadn't meant to speak out loud.  "Nothing."  He looked at her, not sure that he believed her.  "Actually, could you hand me the phone?  I want to call the hospital and see who the ambulance crew brought it."

"You want to know if he's OK."  He stood there staring at her with his hands on his hips.

She looked up and stared back.  "Yes, yes, I do.  I don't think he was in any kind of shape to redecorate.  He just got out of the hospital."

Mulder didn't move, watching mutely as Scully got up and headed to the other room to use the phone in private.  She picked up the phone and was about to dial when she saw the keypad.  There were red streaks on it.  Mostly around the 9 and the 1.  She closed her eyes and fought to keep herself from crying.  When had she begun to care so much about him?  She put the phone to her ear and waited for an answer, hoping that someone would have one.  But it was after five and after several rings, she realized the operators weren't going to answer the phone.

She didn't feel calm enough to sit down and look up the number for the emergency room or to wait for the police that Mulder had summoned.  She grabbed her keys and without a backwards glance or a word of explanation, headed for her car.  She'd been planning on heading straight to the hospital, but she thought better of it for a moment.  Mulder would take care of her apartment, but no one would notice Krycek's place.  She drove over there, breaking every traffic law imaginable.

Pulling into the parking lot, she waved at Krycek's friend, Brian.  She smiled at him and tried not to look too worried.  "Has Alex been here today?"  She didn't want to sound like an investigator, but she needed to know.

He shook his head and frowned.  "Not since you were here together.  I couldn't tell you where he's gotten to."

"Have you seen anyone else around that seemed out of place?  Anyone going in the building that doesn't live here?"

Brian caught on to the questions.  "Is everything all right?  Is Alex in some sort of trouble?"

She pulled out her badge and showed it.  "I'm trying to find out where he is and if he's hurt."

"He really hasn't been around much for the last few days."  Brian shrugged.  "I don't want to get into any trouble, if I knew something, I'd tell you."

She gave him one of her cards.  "If you see him in the next few hours or so, give me a call, all right?  I'm not trying to get him in trouble.  I'm just worried."

Brian agreed and Scully went into the building.  She realized that she didn't have a key, but with the way things were going for her, she wouldn't need one.  His door was standing slightly open.  She pushed it open and gasped.  If her place looked bad, his was worse.  A hundred times worse.  She knew it wasn't just someone looking for things.  She looked through all the rooms and couldn't find a single piece of glass that wasn't shattered.  The furniture had been slashed opened and the stuffing removed.  Everything had been pulled out of the cabinets, tossed to the ground.  All the drawers had been emptied, contents thrown on the floor.  Papers were lying everywhere, books pulled off shelves, everything relocated to somewhere it shouldn't be.  She knew it had probably been a search for something, but there was more to it.  Whoever had torn his place apart hated him.  Hated him with a passion.  Hated him more than Mulder would have thought possible.

She stood there in the midst of the chaos, with the room lit only with the hallway light.  Every lamp was on its side and she was sure all the bulbs were broken as well.  She stepped into the living room and looked for the pictures, hoping she would be able to salvage them.  After a bit of searching, she managed to find the one of him and Ali.  She stared at it in the dimly lit room and hoped that one day everything would work out for them.  She knew Krycek hadn't done this to his own apartment, and therefore hadn't done it to hers either.  She believed that much.  She was convinced of his innocence.  She put the picture back in the mess and left for the hospital.  The same one he'd just gotten out of.  The same one she hoped he'd be leaving again soon.

She sat in the parking lot staring at the doors to the hospital for a while.  She wanted to know how he was.  But she was afraid that, after seeing the mess they'd made of his apartment, he would be dead.  He'd managed to call the ambulance, but that didn't mean he'd survived.  Her lips turned into a frown involuntarily, but she didn't cry.  If he was dead, she'd kill the bastards and everyone who meant anything to them.

The thought was sobering, at least slightly.  She pulled out her phone and frantically dialed Mulder's cellular.  Krycek had become involved in something over his head and sucked her into it.  She'd sucked Mulder and Skinner in as well.  The men who had torn their places apart were looking for something.  Something that they probably hadn't found.  And that meant everybody was fair game.

Mulder didn't sound happy to be on the phone.  "What?"

"Mulder, it's me."  She waited for him to yell at her for taking off the way she had, but he didn't.  "Have you been home yet?"

"No, the police aren't done here yet.  Why?"

"I think maybe we, I, stumbled into something here.  Krycek's apartment is worse than mine and I have a sick feeling that yours and Skinner's places met the same fate."

"Have you found the bastard that drug us into this yet?"  She heard him talking to someone else, probably the police, and waited until he was done.

"I'm at the hospital now, but I don't know if he's here.  I just wanted to check on you."  She didn't want him in danger, no matter how strangely he was acting.

"The police are done here, so I'll head home and see.  I'll call Skinner and check with him too.  Let me know if you find him?"

"OK.  And thank you."  She was about to hang up the phone when she heard Mulder calling her.  "What?"

"What should I do with the cat?"

She could hear it crying in the background.  She'd forgotten the finer points of pet care.  "See if Mrs. Sylenski will watch her.  If not, just lock her in the bathroom and leave her there.  I'll be home in a little while."  She put the phone back in her pocket and trudged slowly towards the doors of the emergency room.  This wasn't something she was looking forward to.

It didn't take long to explain who she was looking for.  But the fact that she hadn't been called and that she had no idea if he'd been able to give his name and if he had, if he'd given his real name, was not beneficial to her case. The nurse at the desk wasn't exactly pleasant.

"Look, I have a friend who works up on the fifth floor, she knows the man I'm looking for as well.  Could you possibly check to see if she's working?" It was too early for the night shift to be on, but nurses usually rotated schedules.  There was a chance Angela would be working.

"What's her name?"  Scully gave it to her.  The first name, which was all she had.  "If you don't know her name, I won't be able to find her."

Scully dropped her hands onto the desk considerably harder than she needed to.  "Look, ma'am, she's taken care of him before.  Just call the fifth floor and see if she's there.  If you can't do that, I'll go up there and check for myself."

The nurse's nasal voice irritated Scully unspeakably so, regardless of her unwillingness to help.  "Visiting hours are over, Miss."  Scully narrowed her eyes and mentally declared war on the woman.  She was not in the mood for this.

"I am an FBI agent. Several crimes were committed this afternoon with a direct connection to one of your patients.  Now, I want to know if he's here, if he came here and left, or if you could possibly check to see if Angela is working on the fifth floor this evening."

Deborah, as her name tag declared, picked up the phone and called the fifth floor, making a big show out of not knowing Angela's last name.  She frowned and put the phone back down.  "Angela is working in the ICU this evening."

Scully smiled her most annoying little smile and politely asked for directions to the ICU.  When Deborah tried her best to obnoxiously mention that ICU visiting hours were over as well, Scully took it in stride.  "I'm not visiting.  And I don't think you'd really like me to make trouble, now would you?"  Deborah shook her head, indicating that she did not, in fact, want any trouble and gave Scully directions to the ICU.

Scully walked up to the nurses station in front of the ICU, hoping that she wasn't going to meet anymore disgruntled hospital employees.  The one nurse at the desk was on the phone, facing away from her.  She stood there quietly, catching pieces of the conversation and recognizing Angela's voice almost immediately.

"It should be in the front pocket of my uniform… I was wearing the white one with the blue flowers on it… No, it's a business card… I just wanted to tell the woman that her husband was here….Roger, they're newlyweds…I'd want someone to call me…"

As soon as she realized Angela was talking about her, she leaned closer and tried to pick up more of the conversation.  But it was already over and she watched Angela hang up the receiver.  If Angela was trying to find her, then she'd seen Krycek.  Scully cleared her throat and Angela finally noticed her.

"Dana, oh my goodness, I was just trying to get your number."

Her voice came out in the timid and frightened tone that seemed appropriate for someone worried about her new husband.  "Is Alex here?  Have you seen him?"

Angela walked around the desk and put an arm around Scully's shoulders, walking her towards one of the rooms.  "I know this is going to scare you, but it looks worse than it is."  She stopped at a closed door.  "He's not out of the woods yet, but we're doing all we can.  I can only let you stay a moment, I'm not used to working this unit and it's after visiting hours."

Angela may have said more, but Scully was busy concentrating on not crying.  He was in the ICU.  That was never good.  Angela moved out of the way, allowing Scully access to the door.  She walked in slowly, terrified of what she was going to find.  Whenever Mulder was in the hospital, even the ICU, she'd been with him the whole time and knew the extent of the injuries.  She hated not knowing.

She tried her hardest not to show her surprise, although there was no one there to see it.  Angela had left her alone for the moment and Krycek was unconscious.  She stepped as close as she could to the side of the bed.  She didn't know how Angela had recognized him, she barely could.  He had two black eyes, one whole side of his face was swollen, he had stitches in several locations on his face, and there were the standard assorted cuts and scratches.

The tears she'd been fighting the whole evening broke free, with her nightmare realized.  He was hurt.  Someone had found him in her apartment and beat him terribly.  She could only imagine the damage that she couldn't see, the internal injuries that would have landed him in the ICU.  She didn't want to know what all was wrong with him anymore, she just needed to know that he would be OK.  And that was something the doctors didn't know yet.  Mulder would probably be happy to hear about the shape Krycek was in, but even he would have to admit that no one had done this to himself.  She reached for his hand and noticed the cast.  She reached across him and squeezed his other hand, bruised, but not broken.  Then she brushed her fingers through his hair.  He had been telling her the truth, this was her proof.  She'd go to jail to prove it to Mulder if she had to.  She knew he was being honest.

She heard a knock on the opened door and saw Angela standing there, signaling that it was time for her to go.  She leaned over and kissed him on the lips lightly.

She whispered so no one else would hear her.  No one except the man lying unconscious in the bed before her.  "I'm here, Alex.  I have to leave, but I'll be here tomorrow.  You have to wake up and tell me who did this to you and why.  I swear I'll find them, I'll make them pay."

Then she walked out, pausing only long enough to give Angela another card.  Angela called after her, probably trying to tell her about the injuries or his doctor's name or visiting hours or something, but Scully didn't want to hear it.  She couldn't stop crying.  The rage, the hurt, the fear, all of it pouring out of her.  She drove even less carefully on her way home than she had on the way there, she care even less who noticed.  She parked her car in front of Mulder's building and ran up the stairs.  He probably didn't want to see her, but she wanted to see him.  She needed to see him.  She needed to hold onto whatever she could reach and he seemed like the easiest target and also the least likely to question her.

He answered the door, not initially understanding her incessant, hysterical pounding.  But he hadn't answered the door instantaneously and she'd panicked, slamming her fists angrily into the wood.  She could barely see through the tears and missed it when he pulled the door open.  He caught her fist before she hit him and pulled her into a hug, telling her over and over again that everything was going to be fine.

When she calmed down enough to open her eyes, she saw that his apartment had not been spared.  It lay in ruin, somewhere on the scale between hers and Krycek's.  She felt responsible.  He hadn't wanted, and actually had, nothing to do with it, but he'd been victimized as well.  And this much, his apartment, was her fault.

"I'm sorry.  I didn't know this was going to happen.  I'm so sorry."  Her tears continued to fall, blurring his forgiving face.

"Shhhh, it's OK.  You didn't do this.  It's all right."

Her fingers curled into fists and clung uselessly to his shirt.  She couldn't find the words to tell him about Krycek and she knew he didn't care anyway.  She couldn't tell him that she was so upset over something Mulder had probably wished for.  She ducked her head down and leaned on him, allowing him to hold her up.  She felt his hands leave her back and she wanted to protest.  But she heard the door swing shut and then felt his hands again, this time on her face.

He kissed the top of her head again, as he had that morning, carefully moving and kissing her forehead as well.  He continued to whisper to her, making promises that she knew he had no right to.  But it comforted her, made her feel safe.  And his rain of kisses on her face continued as well, torturously slow and gentle, until he finally covered her mouth with his.

End Part Two
Continued in Part Three

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